Musings during connection deprivation Part 1

I have come to love
This child inside of me
I love him since he has this enormous
Sense of fun, almost devilment

He cavorts in my thoughts
Making mischievous suggestions
At highly inappropriate times

The protector, well
A bit difficult really
Respect the competence, the relentlessness
But I don't always like it
My conscience drives
Which when you know how I drive
Is quite worrying

I think ethical self determination might be the best word
Twisted by the need to stabilise, to survive
Self Control Freak, I salute you

So in amongst this, who am I
This integrating meta-being
This will o the wisp
This analogue cipher
In a digital life
This spirit oft damped
As playfulness fought with duty
The collateral damage?

I do know I am a calming voice
When my thoughts are tumultuous
It is I that calms me, not adventure, not control

For I am love

A Funny Old Life